02/02/2023
A long but super good read.
I am also someone that take things to heart and will keep me up at night, trying to figure out the best way to talk it out. Thanks Craig for writing this so well. Some good points and light humor too!
I can add from my experience. Horses are looking for a leader, theyāll do well with a friend, but even better with true guidance. The warm and fuzzies are good until itās not.
A Few Thoughts From a Recent Criticism
These days Iām most fascinated by people. You can prove to them that something works and theyāll not believe it or theyāll just go into all the reasons why itās bad. We are experts at rationalizing our thoughts and opinions.
So I wake up this morning and find a comment from a person on a video I recently posted. The video is of a 9 year old Welsh Cob mare getting her first ride. And the comment was about how what I was doing was wrong and trust needed to be built first. Her theory was that time needs to be spent sitting with a horse and asking for absolutely nothing. Just being there, and being present. Well in my opinion thatās just fine! If thatās what you want to do with your own horse then great! However, I charge money for what I do. And for that money folks would like some results. If I canāt get results then I let the owner know and send the horse back. I donāt make claims that I can train them all.
Hereās what fascinated me the most though, I would bet that this is the kind of person that talks about acceptance and understanding. They probably promote being understanding of all others and accepting them for who they are. But then that changes when they see something they donāt like. I shared enough of that session so a person could see the horse was worried. Then they could see how we came out pretty good in the end. The horse was being ridden on her very first session here. And I was sitting up there petting her softly by the end. To me, the horse was clearly learning and improving.
Hereās the deal, I donāt mind how ever that lady wants to work with horses. She can expect little or nothing at all from them and I wonāt go to her page and badmouth it. But she came to mine and did just that. And of course she thinks sheās helping people. Turning them away from what she might consider as a completely bad or evil way to interact with a horse. Itās ironic because Iād tell folks of why I donāt agree with how she does things. Iād give opposite advise from what she gives and Iād also think Iām helping. The irony is that we will both help people while giving opposite advice. The advice a person needs is highly based on their individuality and current issue(s) with their horse(s). While her and I may not agree, I can respect the fact that some people need to hear the information sheās spreading. I can also criticize the information sheās spreading because itās that kind of information that held me back and stunted my growth in the past.
Another thing Iāve noticed is that many people like her will post quotes or memes of Ray Hunt. Then I really have to laugh to myself! Iāve got a few of Rayās videos. The guy was AMAZING!! Iāve learned so much from those videos. But he also got a lot done in a short amount of time. He also got on some horses who still had some worry and helped them through it. And Iām by no means near as good as Ray was. But I bet Iām as good as Ray was at one point. When he was younger and learning to get as good as he ended up being. Itās a journey and a process. Iām doing my best to help as many horses and people as I can but I make no claim to be perfect. Iām not even close to finished learning. I honestly have no idea what my horse interactions will look like in the future. The point of this paragraph is that people will share his quotes while they discredit folks who ride horses ātoo fastā. They like his words but know little of his actual work. Iām personally a HUGE fan of Ray.
Getting back to the ladies idea of sitting with a horse and asking for nothing. While I wonāt go on her page to criticize it, I will tell yāall how I currently feel about it. Iāve kind of tried it, and let me explain what that means. I donāt want to say I fully tried it because honestly I couldnāt do it. It wasnāt for me, so I can guarantee I gave up long before anything like results started to creep in. Hereās the thing, weāre all individuals. Itās our individuality that will dictate things we will and wonāt be good at. And I knew very early on that I wouldnāt be capable of sitting around doing nothing with a horse AND taking someone elseās money. I knew I wanted to do this to make my living so that also had some weight.
So the first issue is that the technique didnāt align with me as a person (maybe one day it will, who knows š¤·š»āāļø). The second issue is that Iām a keen observer, and do you know what I saw and continue to see? A house of cards! No matter how big it was built, a tiny breeze could blow it over and it was like completely starting over. So you build this horses trust by asking ABSOLUTELY nothing from him. Then you start saddling, and itās going good. Then you get the ground work done with the saddle and youāre feeling great! Heck smooth sailing, just like that tree hugging lady on the internet said! Then your confidence is beaming so you get a ride in! You donāt move the horse at all but heck, you rode him! Day two of riding you even take a few steps! BUTā¦ā¦..somewhere between ride 2 and ride 6 old fluffy BLOWS UP! Yupā¦the house of cards comes crashing down. Of course youāll blame the wind, the cat, your husband, the leadrope, a unicorn fart, yourself, or who knows what else, anything but the horse or the method.
What a devastating day, and honestly I feel bad for these folks. Many invest anywhere from 6-18 months on this way of ātrainingā. But back to the story. The next day you go out to catch your horse to figure out what went wrong, hoping it was a fluke. But guess what! Heās hard to catch. You get him caught, but then heās TERRIFIED! He doesnāt trust your hand, the brush, the saddle pad, and donāt even think about picking up that saddle! Talk about discouraging! You just invested months and months into this. And now you feel worse off than when you started. You feel like youāve wasted a year of your life. You feel like youāll never ride this horse. You question if you should just sell all your horse stuff and get a new hobby.
I really feel for these folks. I feel like they were mislead with false promises about doing less and getting more. And yes, in the process, no stress horse training feels better. You constantly relax your horse and never get him worried. But now he has a smaller comfort zone and doesnāt know how to respond when he gets worried. Heās been coddled and catered to. His worries are what tell you what to do. And heās being built into something weād consider dangerous. Think about how bad this type of upbringing would be for kids. Itās similar to raising a spoiled and entitled kid. The world is a much harder place for them as an adult than a kid who was given discipline and difficult situations to conquer.
Obviously yāall can change a few minor details but weāve heard many stories like this. Folks waste a lot of time and sometimes the horse is beyond repair for that person. What that person taught that horse can generally be fixed for a different person. But itās harder to fix for the actual owner because now the owner has PTSD from getting bucked off or hurt by that horse. He can sense your fear and lack of leadership and itās a recipe for inevitable chaos in the future. Itās a very damaged relationship and tough to rebuild. Generally the person who dug the hole has a hard time filling it back in. Iāve also seen folks who say they used stress-free training but then after an incident like written above, they go to moving the horses feet. They get him desensitized and responding better and get things straightened out then go back to the stress-free way. So pretty much they spend a little time doing some things a lot like the things I do to gain some control and success in those worried spots. š
Iāve avoided criticizing passive horsemanship but Iām going to be honest with yāall. Itās starting to lead to a lot of injuries and dangerous horses. Dangerous doesnāt always mean they attack people out of aggression. Sometimes it means theyāll kill you to save their own life. Theyāll run you over if a plastic bag blows by, theyāll run off if a tree stump looks peculiar to them, or they might just buck you off because a fly bit them.
Hereās my main point. Donāt judge others for the way they do things. If itās animal abuse then Iāll grab my pitchfork and fight with you! But just because an animal is uncomfortable doesnāt make it abuse.
Be observant, take what you like and leave what you donāt. But be aware of what your animals turn into and try to figure out why. Also be aware of what other peoples animals are like and try to figure out why. If you want your horse to be more like someone elseās horse then you may need to do some of the things they do. Or you may need a new horse, they arenāt machines, their individuality must also be considered.
The best thing you can do is train your horse well. Then it will always have value. That will give your horse the very best chance at a good life if something were to happen to you.
My last bit of adviceā¦hire a pro! Finding a good one that you like and trust will be the toughest part. But itās worth it. I donāt do my own taxes and I donāt suggest folks start their own c**ts. If you are going to do it, just know itās going to be a bumpy ride. No matter what the guys on the internet say, donāt expect smooth sailing. Horse training is an amazing puzzle because of the challenges that arise and the rewards of overcoming them. If youāre up for the challenge, be ready for the struggle.
Live and let live.
If you want other people to do what you do, all you have to do is get consistently better results than them. Thatās the the convincing theyāll need.
