08/21/2026
I’m going to say something that might save a few people from spending the next two years wondering what the hell happened to their “chill puppy.” A puppy is not a blank slate. I spend a lot of time around dog sports, where people stack the genetic deck as hard as humanly possible. They buy a puppy whose parents did the sport, whose grandparents did it, whose great-grandparents did it. Generations of dogs deliberately selected for very specific traits. And sometimes that puppy grows up and says, “Actually, I would rather sniff berries than bite the bad guy.” It happens. Genetics are not an Amazon order.
So if people who are deliberately stacking every genetic factor they possibly can still don’t always get exactly the dog they expected, I’m not sure why we think grabbing a fluffy Border Collie/Husky mystery puppy, having never met either parent, knowing basically nothing about its genetics, and announcing, “He’ll be chill with me,” is a particularly solid plan. Maybe! Or maybe somewhere between six months and two years old you discover that you purchased a furry cardio program with opinions and absolutely no interest in your plans for a quiet Saturday.
And this is where dogs get the short end of the stick. People fall in love with the picture, the color, the fluffy ears, or the imaginary adult dog they have already constructed in their head. Then the actual dog grows up, turns out to have its own temperament, drives, energy level, and opinions about how life should be lived, and suddenly everybody is surprised. Sometimes everyone adjusts and trains the dog. Sometimes the dog gets rehomed. Then rehomed again. And again. Until eventually somebody gets a dog whose personality actually fits their life.
There is absolutely nothing wrong with wanting a chill teddy-bear dog. There’s also nothing wrong with wanting a dog that hikes 15 miles, plays sports, works all day, and considers sitting quietly on the couch a violation of its civil rights. But we should probably get a lot better at choosing the dog that fits the life, instead of choosing the dog we think is cute and assuming personality will sort itself out later.
Honestly, if your biggest priority is temperament rather than specifically raising a puppy, go look at adult dogs in rescues and shelters. And actually talk to the people who know them. Ask the foster. Ask the shelter staff who handles that dog every day. Ask the volunteers who walk them. Don’t tell them your entire wish list first and then ask, “Do you think he could be that?” Ask, “What is this dog actually like?” Then pay attention to the answer instead of negotiating with it because the dog has really pretty eyes.
The chill teddy bears deserve people who genuinely want a chill teddy-bear life, and the furry cardio programs deserve people who actually enjoy living with furry cardio programs. As for the drivey little as****es? Send those to me. I love them.
