09/04/2026
🚨 CARL, OH CARL. 🚨
Meet Carl, a 2-year-old neutered Pit Bull mix who is currently a little more crusty than cute in the skin department and has absolutely no respect for county property.
First—the skin. Carl's currently rocking the “my skincare routine needs professional intervention” look. Thankfully, with regular baths and sensitive-skin food, our crusty little king should be feeling—and looking—much better.
The bigger issue?
Carl is a menace. Not a mean menace. Not a scary menace. More of a “why is your water bucket shaped like THAT?” menace.
If you've visited us lately, you may have witnessed Carl the Demolisher™ conducting his daily business.
His water bucket?
Crushed and dented like a soda can.
His food bowl after dinner?
Dinner is over. Bowl has served its purpose. YEET.
Anything shiny within reach?
Destroyed. Disrespected. Financially devastating.
Carl. This is a county facility. WE HAVE A BUDGET.
Underneath his budding career in demolition, Carl is actually a pretty great dude. He's done well with other dogs and could absolutely enjoy having a canine partner in crime.
Cats, however?
✨ ABSOLUTELY NOT. ✨
Carl met our office manager, Wade, and was just a little too enthusiastic about getting to know him.
There was staring. There was interest. There may have been an attempted taste test.
Carl, Oh Carl. We do not put our coworkers in our mouths.
Wade survived the encounter with his dignity intact, but the meeting was enough for us to confidently say Carl's future home should be cat-free.
Not "my cat is basically a dog." Not "my cat will teach him." Not "they'll figure it out."
We have gathered sufficient data. Thank you for your participation.
So if you've got a cat-free home, sturdy belongings, a sense of humor, and room for one handsome little domestic terrorist—Carl may be your guy.
He's neutered. He's dog-friendly. He's working on his skin. He's fun. He's ridiculous.
