02/28/2021
Amy Skinner Horsemanship
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Boarding barns everywhere seem to breed drama. Maybe where you board you experience this. As someone who’s worked just about every type of job in a barn as well as boarded, I feel intimately familiar with the complaints of every position from every angle. The tension is palpable in some barns, as an outside instructor walking the barn aisles to the arena - some places everyone is unhappy, from the staff, to the boarders to the horses.
Does this sound familiar to you? Often people flee one barn to find themselves entrenched in the drama of another barn. Some barns foster a happier atmosphere than others, but, there is plenty you can do to help foster a happier atmosphere, or at the very least, not contribute further to the toxic culture that many boarding barns have.
Here are five easy things you can do:
1- don’t gossip. Don’t listen to it, don’t spread it, don’t engage in it. Just don’t do it.
2- let the barn staff know you appreciate them. Letting them know you appreciate their efforts can go a long way. Barn staff are often overworked and underpaid and they are also too often stuck between blame from the unhappy boarders and stressed management. A barn staff that feels appreciated is more likely to take better care of your horse and you. A coffee, cookies, a Christmas tip, or even just a simple thank you go a long way.
3- make your wants and needs clear. Don’t assume anything ever - communicate to your barn staff, to the management, and to others what you want. Resentment is so often avoided easily by simple communication.
4- mind your own business. Hate the new trainer? Don’t use them. Hate what Susie rides her horse in? Focus on your own. Think sally is riding her horse on the forehand, Becky is on the wrong diagonal, Tina is into the newest YouTube wonder? Who cares. Ride your own horse and be nice to other people. Short of neglect or abuse, it really really doesn’t matter.
5- lend a hand. Close the gate for someone riding. Sweep up a mess that isn’t yours. Throw hay out for overburdened staff. Do one simple thing each time you’re out to help out and you’ll be amazed at the changes in people. People work harder when they feel appreciated, supported, and like they are part of a team. If you foster a spirit of camaraderie, others may feel more inclined to do the same.
A great Eckhart Tolle quote: “change the situation, leave it, or accept it. All else is madness.” If you hate your barn, leave, or make it better. But don’t spread your misery around.
