18/06/2025
It’s great to see the Government announcing extra effort into su***de prevention.
Sadly, rather than look at the positives of this, Stuff’s Three News decided to spend their airtime questioning its usefulness and purpose. This has annoyed me somewhat.
Given the quantity of men who choose to leave us by their own means, I figured I’d list some things that we can all be aware of, and do our bit towards betterment.
So here’s seven basic signs that show how a man is emotionally exhausted, while pretending to be ok.
1. He stops having preferences - instead he’s always willing to do what other people want. He gives in with zero fight and no mention of what matters to him, the things he would enjoy.
2. He has a very different public and private demeanor. At home he's quiet and withdrawn but as soon as the doorbell rings he's cracking jokes and acting the social butterfly.
3. He retreats further from his relationships and pours more into his work. He uses the little enthusiasm he has left to get the work done - and relationships take a back seat as they require energy he doesn't have.
4. He downplays his struggles and brushes off concern. When someone asks how he's doing, he always says, "I'm good" “I’m fine” or "Just tired" - never opening up about what's really going on.
5. He becomes overly self-sufficient and stops asking for help. He doesn't want to burden others and believes it’s just easier to carry everything alone, so he refuses support even when he needs it.
6. He loses interest in things he used to enjoy. Hobbies, passions, even small daily pleasures suddenly become too much effort, so he just tells himself they don't matter anymore.
7. He gets easily irritated over small things. His patience runs thin, and he reacts more than he used to over minor inconveniences - not because they're a big deal, but simply because he's emotionally drained.
When a man is emotionally exhausted, he shows up less and less for himself, but pays more and more for it.
Throughout human history we haven’t seen the signs - because we weren’t looking. Men are meant to be strong and provide the shoulders for society to stand on, frailty is not an option.
Now we are far more aware, we do see it.
You can’t rely on men to ask for help, there’s reluctance to show weakness, a stigma. The above spells that out. Instead, you have to notice it, then carefully work out how to be the support.
Let’s not rely on the Government, nor on our overworked mental heath professionals, let’s look after ourselves. It’s doable.
I’ll leave it there.
