08/29/2026
(Strap in! This is a long one, but it's a topic I feel very passionately about, and something I start all of my clients on.)
One of the most important parts of dog training isn't sit, stay, recall, or heel — and it isn't really about the tools you choose to use either. It's communication. And yet it's the piece that gets overlooked the most.
Dogs aren't born understanding what *sit* means. They don't automatically know that *good dog* means they got something right or that the frustration in your voice means they made the wrong choice. Everything we expect from our dogs has to be taught. So when owners are struggling — when nothing seems to be clicking — the solution isn't always more commands or more training sessions. Sometimes, the biggest shift comes from simply getting clearer about how we're communicating in the first place.
Think about what it would feel like to learn something from someone who speaks a completely different language. They occasionally get excited when you do something right, sometimes seem frustrated when you don't, and most of the time, their instructions don't make any sense to you. You'd be confused, too. Our dogs feel that same confusion when we haven't taken the time to build a shared language with them.
The good news is that building that language doesn't have to be complicated.
When we train our dogs, we're creating a way to communicate two really important things: *yes, that's exactly what I wanted* — and *that wasn't quite right, try again.* When those signals are clear and consistent, dogs don't have to guess what we're asking. They know which behaviours earn rewards, and they know when they've made the wrong choice.
One of the best places to start is with a reward marker. A reward marker is a word or sound that tells your dog, *yes, I liked that, and something good is coming.* It can be a clicker, a word like "yes!", or any short, consistent sound — the specific marker matters far less than what it means to your dog.
The reason this is so powerful is precision. Imagine you're teaching your dog to sit. The moment their bum touches the ground, you say "yes!" — and then you give them their treat. Over time, your dog begins to understand that the marker means *that exact thing you just did was correct.* It bridges the gap between the moment they do something right and the moment the reward actually reaches them. That gap matters more than most people realize.
Before you can use a reward marker in training, though, you have to teach your dog what it means. This is called charging or priming the marker, and it's genuinely simple. Find somewhere quiet, say your marker word, and immediately give your dog a treat. That's it. "Yes!" → Treat. "Yes!" → Treat. Over and over. Your dog doesn't have to do anything — no sit, no eye contact, nothing. You're just teaching them that the sound predicts something good. Eventually, you'll notice a visible change when they hear the word. Their ears perk up, they look toward you, their whole body says *oh, that means something good is coming.* Once you see that response, you're ready to start using it in training.
Now, when most people think about rewarding their dogs, treats come to mind first — and food is a great place to start. It's quick, convenient, and easy for dogs to understand. But treats aren't the only reward that matters, and not all treats are equal. A piece of kibble might be plenty exciting in your quiet living room. Outside at a busy park? You might need something much higher value.
More importantly, food isn't the only thing dogs find rewarding at all. For some dogs, play is everything — tug, fetch, chasing their person around the yard. Some dogs are crazy about physical affection: scratches behind the ears, enthusiastic praise, a good wrestle. Some of the most overlooked rewards are the everyday things dogs already want access to. Going outside. Getting to sniff a tree. Running in the yard. Greeting another dog. Instead of just letting your dog drag you toward an interesting smell, you could ask for a few steps of loose leash walking first — then release them to go sniff. The sniff becomes the reward. Suddenly, the whole world is part of your training.
The key thing to understand is that what's rewarding to your dog is what your *dog* finds rewarding — not what you assume they should find rewarding. If your dog moves away when you reach to pet them, petting probably isn't the best reward for a job well done. What motivates them can shift depending on the environment. Getting to know your individual dog — what they love, what makes their eyes light up — is some of the most valuable work you can do.
Communication isn't only about telling your dog when they've done something right, though. You also need a way to communicate when they haven't. That's where a non-reward marker comes in. Something like "uh-uh" or "nope" — said calmly, not as a punishment, but as information. It simply tells your dog: *that option didn't work, try something else.* So if you ask your dog to sit and they offer a down instead, you say "uh-uh," they get up and try again, they sit — and now you can say "yes!" and reward. Both sides of the conversation are clear. The dog doesn't have to guess.
Dogs are incredibly good at learning patterns, but they need clear information from us to do it. Without that clarity, things fall apart in ways that can feel baffling. Rewarding your dog for jumping on you when you're excited to see them — then getting frustrated when they jump on guests — leaves your dog with no clear rule. Sometimes jumping works. Sometimes, it doesn't. From their perspective, the pattern is inconsistent. Or think about what happens when you call your dog, and sometimes they get a treat, and sometimes you immediately end their fun, and sometimes you just keep repeating "come, come, COME" until the word loses all meaning. Consistency isn't about being rigid — it's about giving your dog the information they need to understand what you actually want.
Our dogs aren't mind readers. What seems obvious to us often isn't obvious to them at all. They don't automatically know what we want or understand our expectations — they need to be taught. And that's genuinely okay. Training isn't about expecting dogs to magically know the right answer. It's about teaching them the language, showing them what works, giving them clear feedback when they're off track, and rewarding the choices we want to see again.
When training isn't going well, it's worth asking some honest questions before deciding that the dog is being stubborn or difficult. Have you actually taught the cue? Does the dog understand what earns the reward? Have you practiced in different environments? Do they understand what happens when they make the wrong choice? Have you been consistent? Because more often than not, when a dog isn't responding the way we'd hoped, it isn't stubbornness. It's confusion. And clearing up that confusion can completely change things.
Good training isn't a one-sided conversation where we give orders and expect compliance. It's actually a conversation — one where our dogs are constantly communicating through their behaviour, and our job is to get good at communicating back. A reward marker tells them *yes, that was right.* A meaningful reward tells them *that choice was worth making.* A non-reward marker tells them *not quite — try again.* Together, those things create clarity, and clarity builds understanding, and understanding builds confidence.
Confident dogs who understand what's being asked of them are so much better at making good choices. So before adding another command or another tool or another complicated training exercise, it might be worth going back to the beginning and asking one simple question: does my dog actually understand what I'm trying to communicate?
Because when you build a clear, consistent language together, training starts to feel less like correcting mistakes — and more like having a real conversation. And that changes everything.
