10/05/2026
I have needed some time before I could write this because every time I tried, I couldn't find words big enough for how heartbroken we are.
One of the things I don't think people always see about this little business of ours is how much we genuinely love the animals entrusted to us. They aren't a name on a schedule or another stop in our day. We learn their routines and their weird little habits. We know what makes their tails wag and where they like to be scratched. We talk about them when we get home. Our kids ask about them. They become woven into our family and into our lives, and we love them knowing that someday, loving them may also mean grieving them.
Right now, we are grieving Duke.
Duke was a beautiful, young Bernese Mountain Dog who we had the absolute honour of caring for, along with his sister Lucy, since this spring. We cared for them for weeks at a time, and Duke became one of the brightest parts of our summer. Me, Jason and the kids all loved going to their house. We called him Pony Boy because this enormous, goofy dog seemed convinced he was actually a pony. He would come charging up between your legs whether you were prepared for 100+ pounds of Bernese Mountain Dog or not, plant himself there and wait for his butt scratches, tail going absolutely wild and tongue hanging out of his mouth in pure happiness.
Every single drop in at his home, he would greet us by dragging his huge bed from the living room into the porch, as though he needed to bring his belongings along for the visit. He loved raspberries from the garden. He would walk over to the raspberry bushes, sit beside them and tilt his head while he waited for us to pick him his treat. These tiny, ridiculous, beautiful things became part of our days.
Before his dad, left for work this last turnaround, he noticed Duke had started eating grass. At first, none of us thought much of it. Lucy has happily grazed on grass like a little sheep since she was a puppy, and Duke otherwise seemed like Duke. We thought maybe he was doing monkey see, monkey do. When it continued, though, we started trying to figure out why. We cleaned and thoroughly sanitized his food containers in case oils from his kibble had gone rancid. We drained his little pool in case the water had become stagnant. We watched him closely for anything else that might tell us his belly was bothering him, but there were no other obvious signs that something was seriously wrong.
Then, on the evening of Sunday, September 27, during our last drop in of the day, Duke wasn't quite himself, he was tired and didnt want to walk very far. But again, this wasnt untypical behavior for Duke from time to time. But we agreed that if he wasn't back to himself by morning, we would call the vet.
Monday morning, everything changed when we arrived, it was immediately apparent that something was wrong. Duke had been heavily sick through the night, and had very little energy, and had visibly lost weight from how much fluid he had lost overnight. We made the call immediately, and I drove our Pony Boy to Gander to see the emergency vet. But even there he seemed to perk up more and wasn't showing those obvious signs of distress.
While we waited for answers, this huge, beautiful boy sat between my legs and leaned against me. He rested his tired head in my hand while I wrapped my other arm around him smoothing him down and kept looking up at me with those big brown eyes. I didn't know then how much I would hold onto that moment.
His X-rays appeared to show two possible blockages, although the vet couldn't be certain what they were seeing. They gave him fluids and medication in hopes that whatever was there would pass. Yvan was due home that evening, and if the treatment didn't work, Duke would need exploratory surgery the following day.
It didn't work, so they proceeded with the exploratory surgery, where they discovered that the damage inside his body was severe. It had been severe for a while, even though there was no obvious signs. No bloating, winsing, or temperature. He had been eating and drinking, he was still playful and happy until it was already too late.
It was the call I never, ever wanted to receive and for the first few minutes, I don't think my brain even understood what I was hearing. Pony Boy wasn't coming home and we cried on the phone. Then drove home to Jason and the kids, and my heart broke all over again as our whole family grieved and are still grieving.
There is a particular kind of privilege in being trusted with someone's animals. Their families hand us these little souls that they love beyond words and trust us to keep them safe, comfortable and loved while they're away. We don't take that lightly. Ever. And while I know I advocated so hard for Duke that day, I have racked my brain all week trying to find a way we could have done things differently, but the truth is this was one situation where there wasnt anything anyone could have done because the signs simply were not there for how bad he was.
Duke, I wish we had gotten so much more time with you. I wish there were more raspberries to pick for you. More giant beds to drag into the porch. More visits where we'd open the door and brace ourselves because a Bernese Mountain Dog who thought he was a pony was about to come barreling toward us, ready to wedge himself between someone's legs for butt scratches.
I am so grateful that during one of your last day, I got to sit with you for hours between my legs, holding your tired head in my hand and wrapping my arms around you. I hope somewhere inside that big beautiful head, you knew exactly who I was. I hope you knew you weren't alone and you knew that the person holding you loved you too. So very much.
Our hearts are with Yvan and with sweet Lucy, whose world has changed too. There aren't words for the emptiness left behind when a presence as big as Duke's is suddenly gone. Thank you for trusting us with him. Thank you for letting our family love him.
And thank you, Pony Boy, for being one of the brightest parts of our summer.
We will miss you more than you could ever know.
Run free, sweet boy. Find the biggest raspberry patch you can 🤍
