12/08/2026
A note on your compass.
Your compass is what points to what is always true for you. No matter what you learn, how you learn it, or who you learn it from, no matter how it changes your goal or direction with new knowledge or experience- there is something in you that holds true. The way you want to ride, the way you want your horses to feel.
I have never found an instructor whose method is ALL I want. I have never found a method that has EVERY answer, I have never found a method that works for EVERY horse in EVERY situation. But I am selective. I am so selective I've walked out of the first day of a two day clinic and told them to keep my money, not looked back. More than once. Ive learned to fence sit first, before I expose my horse to somebody's method or way of delivering it. I ask different people different questions, I see somebody doing things the way I'd really like to be able to do them, and I go up, introduce myself, and politely ask "how?"
Please show me your workings, please explain your process, please guide me to that place in my understanding, my timing, my feel. Please show me how to help my horse with this.
But every one of those people ends up being a piece of the puzzle. Not a finished product. I don't think any of my mentors would consider themselves a finished product - they are still learning, still exploring, still networking and asking the question of others - "how do you do that? Why that way?" Never have I chosen someone to learn from who has completely changed my compass, changed the way I think about my horse or want to be with him. I've definitely found people who have shown me a better way to achieve what i need to, a kinder way, a more logical way, a way that protects the horse more, or is safer for me, but I choose people who align with my beliefs. And I've become more careful.
Instructor shopping is a dangerous game, someone can really upset, confuse or hurt you or your horse. It doesnt mean their method is bad (sometimes it is!) But it means you need to follow your compass and stop following that path. You don't need to run them out of business (again, if their methods are not cruel, just not in alignment with how you've been riding and training your horse) - you are free to walk away and live and let live, not try to ruin their name! They are not for you, just like you are not for everyone.
But I think it's equally dangerous to latch onto one person, one method, one way of thinking. Even if everything you do is based on the teaching and guidance of that person you trust and want to emulate, you should (and they should) always be open to the 2% things that someone else could have to offer, things that might work for you and your ability, the way you learn, the way you feel, what your goals are. It's not a betrayal to learn from more than one person, and a person who makes you feel like it is, may not have your horse's best interests at heart (but if you follow your compass, you'll know if they are legitimately warning you about a person or method that will genuinely be harmful to your horse's body, mind, or trust in you!) It's about knowing yourself, trusting your circle, and being open to being vulnerable and learning new things while always knowing the way home to what is true to you.
Trust your gut, and if you can't do that - trust your horse. You'll know if they feel better or worse after an hour with you, or with anyone you choose to have work with them, and sometimes no amount of flowery words, facts or figures can top the way a horse feels after being in someone's presence ❤️
Grateful for the people who help me, help my horses, and for the people who trust me to help them on their way with theirs!!
