16/09/2026
Today marks 6 years since we said goodbye to Gemma. ❤️
Gemma came into my life when I was in Year 4. I was away on school camp when I found out my family had bought a Beagle, and from that moment all I wanted to do was go home and meet her.
Then began many, many years of Gemma being Gemma.
She was a Beagle through and through and food driven to her core. She would eat absolutely anything and everything. She was cheeky, stubborn and always kept us on our toes. As she got older, she was constantly pacing around the house and there was rarely a quiet moment.
At the time, some of those things drove me absolutely crazy. Now I'd give anything to hear her pacing around the house again.
Gemma was the first pet that I personally had to make the heartbreaking decision to say goodbye to. What I don't think I've ever really spoken about is how much losing her affected me afterwards.
For almost 6 years, I blamed myself.
I had moments where the sadness completely overwhelmed me. I'd bawl my eyes out, replay everything that happened and constantly question myself. Could I have done more? Did I make the right decision? Did I somehow let her down?
For a long time I thought that was simply what grief looked like for me. It's only more recently that I've started to understand just how stuck I had become in the pain and guilt surrounding that final day. I spent so much time thinking about how I lost her that I don't think I ever really gave myself the chance to grieve her.
Something has started to change though.
I can still remember our final day so clearly. Taking Gemma and Casper to the beach, giving her all different kinds of food to enjoy one last time, and eventually having to say goodbye.
I still replay that day. It still makes me sad. There will probably always be a part of me that wishes I could go back and somehow change things.
But I can think about it now. I can be sad, and I can get through that sadness without completely losing myself in it.
For so long, my mind always went back to the day I lost her. Now I'm slowly learning to look back on all the years I had with her instead.
Although, in some ways, I don't think I ever stopped sharing that part of her. So many people who have come through our home for Meet & Greets over the years have probably heard at least one Gemma story. There always seemed to be an opportunity to tell someone about something ridiculous she'd done, usually involving food or some other bit of cheekiness. 😂
Those are the stories I want to keep telling.
The little Beagle I couldn't wait to get home from school camp to meet. The food-obsessed rascal who would eat anything she could find. The cheekiness. The pacing. The things she did that drove me absolutely insane and that I'd now give anything to experience just one more time.
Six years later, I still miss everything about you, Gemma.
For so long, remembering you meant remembering the pain of losing you. I'm finally learning how to remember your life too.
Miss you always, Gem. ❤️🐾
